{"id":379509,"date":"2013-10-20T15:53:00","date_gmt":"2013-10-20T15:53:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/2013\/10\/20\/what-if\/"},"modified":"2013-10-20T15:53:00","modified_gmt":"2013-10-20T15:53:00","slug":"what-if","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/2013\/10\/20\/what-if\/","title":{"rendered":"What if…"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/p>\n
I had the most amazing experience Friday night.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

I was sifting through mail, unfollowing a number of Facebook posts because e-mail notifications were blowing up my inbox, and just sort of enjoying a quiet night alone since Hubby is out of town.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

He and some buddies have been planning a fourteen-day elk hunt for almost a year now.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

In our twenty-seven years together, this is only the second time I can recall that he\u2019s taken a trip for Him, no wife, no kids, no parents, just him and some friends doing their man thing.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

Until we sell this house he gutted to the foundation and rebuilt, money is a little tight, and he\u2019d thought about selling his spot to someone else.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

But in the end, he took this well-deserved vacation and I\u2019m so happy that he didn\u2019t let Fear or Money or Work get in the way of something he\u2019s been looking forward to for a very long time.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

Big Guy had quietly stashed himself away in his room, so it was just me and my computer in a quiet house.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

As I was scrolling through\u2014delete, delete, delete\u2014<\/i>more than six-hundred lines (nauseating, isn\u2019t it?), I paused on the TEDxSFA2014 title.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t have time right now to watch TED videos; I\u2019ll find them later<\/span><\/i>.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

But curiosity got the best of me and I clicked on the link.<\/span>
<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>You know how it is when you\u2019re expecting one thing, in this case a blurb about someone else\u2019s fabulous ideas that have made it to a TED stage\u2014a movement I\u2019ve been following for more than six years\u2014and you see something you weren\u2019t anticipating? Motion sort of S.T.O.P.S.?<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCongratulations, Annah,\u201d scan, scan, scan<\/i>\u2026is this intriguing enough to draw my attention away from the tasks at hand?…scan<\/i>\u2026\u201dYour proposal, The Power of \u201cWhat if\u201d to heal grief\u2026\u201d scan scan<\/i>\u2014WAIT! STOP!<\/b>\u2014\u201chas been selected\u2026\u201d<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

I think I read that line three or four times.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a><\/div>\n

<\/p>\n

My hands trembled first, but my legs quickly followed suit.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

And then I did what every gal does when she\u2019s encountered something surreal, I picked up the phone to share this with someone before the words on my computer screen evaporated and I discovered it was all just a dream.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

I barely dialed the first number that popped into my head, only to learn that my girlfriend wasn\u2019t home.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

Not to be deterred, I told her hubby I was about to bust a gut and had to tell somebody my news.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

Poor guy. Thankfully he was gracious and did just what his wife would have done, confirmed how exciting all of this was and how great it was that my hard work was finally paying off.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

Of course, I phoned person after person, five in all, before I stopped trembling and started freaking out.<\/o:p><\/span>
<\/span>
I spent a few frantic minutes feeling as if I had only five minutes to write and prepare the speech of my life<\/i>, as TED calls its TEDTalks, and asking myself things like, What if I\u2019d deleted that e-mail?! OMG, what if I throw up on stage?,<\/i> and trying to dispel mind chatter nonsense like I <\/i>have to lose the rest of this weight because the camera adds ten pounds, TEN POUNDS<\/i>.<\/o:p><\/span>
<\/span>
Two days have passed and my mind hasn\u2019t stopped spinning about ideas for that talk.<\/o:p><\/span>
<\/span>
And this morning, when I woke at five a.m. to an instantaneous flood of thoughts, it dawned on me: The only thing I\u2019ll be doing is sharing the same stories I\u2019ve already told over and over and over<\/i>.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

I know every single word, so all I have to do is craft an opening line, fashion a few of these tales into some sensible order, and find people who will let me practice in front of them.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

And well, the standing in front of several hundred people part?<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

Maybe I should look at it like this: What if<\/i>I were to imagine that everyone else who gets up on that stage is as nervous as I am, and that I, too, have the ability to give a performance that wows, in spite of that fear\u2026<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

What if<\/span><\/i> is a question that plays a significant role in grieving.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

What I discovered in my study of recovery is that it also plays an important part in our healing\u2026<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

I\u2019m saving that little epiphany for a future post, but I\u2019ll give you a little hint, come back on Tuesday to read an excerpt from my memoir, Digging for the Light<\/i>.<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

In the meantime, if you\u2019ve never listened to a TEDTalk, do yourself a favor and watch a few of my favorites here<\/span><\/a>, here<\/span><\/a>, here<\/span><\/a>, and here<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/span>
<\/span><\/span>
NOTE:<\/span> The last one? Four minutes, sixteen seconds. That\u2019s all. I guarantee you\u2019ll never again look at a paper towel without this guy coming to mind.<\/span> <\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

If you\u2019re as inspired as I am, consider attending one of the greatest events on earth. Find a TEDx event near you<\/span><\/a>. You\u2019ll be glad you did!<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

And if you\u2019re reading from the Nagadoches, TX area, check out TEDxSFA<\/span><\/a> and watch for their attendance registration to open!<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

I\u2019d love to meet you in person!<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

Their theme? Curiosity.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

I absolutely love the image they use to convey the topic\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a><\/div>\n

<\/o:p><\/span><\/p>\n

Journeyers, this is exactly what recovery is all about!<\/o:p><\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

<\/p>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
These words are exactly some of The Five Facets of Healing<\/i> fundamentals: What if<\/i>(remember, you\u2019ll have to come back Tuesday for that one!) If you\u2019re feeling stagnant or rutted in your grief, ask yourself what it is that you want and then do something different than what you\u2019ve been doing, do anything, but just do something!<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
Bust most of all remember that we\u2019re all travelers on this yellow brick road called Life.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
Some of the paths before us will be painful and some will be pleasant, but one thing is certain, they are plentiful\u2026<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
The other Happy Moments that filled my week included:<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
\u00b7 <\/span><\/span><\/span>Vibrant fall foliage floating in the air and painting the landscapes around me<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
\u00b7 <\/span><\/span><\/span>An electric orange sunrise<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
\u00b7 <\/span><\/span><\/span>Big Guy hollering to me, \u201cMom, I\u2019m heading to practice!,\u201d which, of course, means that he now has his driver\u2019s license and doesn\u2019t have to rely on Mama to get him wherever he needs to go! I\u2019ll say it again: LET FREEDOM RING!<\/b><\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
And lastly, I just had this epiphany!!<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
This month marks the third anniversary of this series (has it really been that long!?), one that began as a way to help us realize that Happiness isn\u2019t some destination, it\u2019s not a Place that we have to arrive by action or bus or plane or train…<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
Happiness is a collection of all of those moments that make us smile, even those that surface during our most difficult times.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
This Happy Happens<\/i> series is an effort to encourage us all to recognize and accept and pay just a teeny tiny bit of homage to those simple events that tend to get trounced upon by Angst and Anxiety.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
As I was recalling those smaller, yet no less significant events from this past week, I realized this: Happy is a thing!<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span>It\u2019s like one of our vital organs\u2026pancreas, brain, heart, happy\u2026<\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span> <\/a><\/div>\n
It resides in our core, close to our heart, and needs to be protected and nourished just like the rest of our body parts.<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/div>\n
It\u2019s like a flower, sometimes it blooms brilliant in our personal gardens and sometimes, when death or disease or destruction touches it, it shrinks away for a while\u2026but the magic is always there, Journeyers, sitting just under the surface of our skin, waiting to shine outward\u2026<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
So, Friends, what about you, how did you feed your happy with this week? Share it here and spread the healing\u2026<\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

<\/p>\n

Soon\u2026<\/span><\/span><\/a><\/o:p><\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I had the most amazing experience Friday night. I was sifting through mail, unfollowing a number of Facebook posts because e-mail notifications were blowing up my inbox, and just sort of enjoying a quiet night alone since Hubby is out of town. He and some buddies have been planning a fourteen-day elk hunt for almost […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3827,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[316,1182,317,161,233,320,431,1156,1183],"class_list":["post-379509","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-happyhappens","tag-curiosity","tag-finding-happiness-in-your-day","tag-happiness","tag-happy-happens","tag-random-happiness","tag-tedtalks","tag-tedxsfa","tag-walt-disney"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/TEDxSFA-Acceptance-EMail.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/379509","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=379509"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/379509\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3827"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=379509"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=379509"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.annahelizabeth.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=379509"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}